Now, of course, I know all too well that depression is real. After all, I see it every day. But I also know we overuse the word. Much of what passes for "depression" in our lives is really more dissatisfaction, a result of either setting the bar impossibly high or expecting treasures that we are unwilling to work for. I know people whose unbearable source of misery is their weight, their baldness, their lack of advancement in their career, or their inability to find the perfect mate, even if they themselves did not behave like one. To these people, unhappiness is a medical condition, an intolerable state of affairs. If pills can help, pills are taken.
But pills are not going to change the fundamental problem in the construction: wanting what we can't have. Looking for self-worth in the mirror. Layering work on top of work and still wondering why we aren't satisfied -- before working some more. I know. I've done all that. I've had periods in my life that I could not have worked more hours in the day without eliminating sleep altogether. I've piled on accomplishments. I've made fairly good money [for a non-surgeon]. I've earned accolades. And the longer I've gone after it, the emptier it has made me feel, like trying to pump air faster and faster into a leaking tire. I can say from experience the satisfaction from such striving is fleeting at best and hollow at worst. Yet sadly, it still doesn't render me immune from further such striving from time to time. The flesh dies hard.
Yet, I can honestly say since the age of 2o I have known why I am here. I have never had to resort to popping a pill for peace of mind. God has placed me here in large part to help relieve the suffering of others. And I've been "privileged" to suffer a bit myself ... a severely arthritic right knee, a virtual amputation and crushing injury to my left foot and ankle, a right shoulder so damaged by years of throwing that surgery was able only to take the edge off the pain accompanying overhead activities such as lifting and, yes, throwing. Lastly, two years ago I faced my own potential mortality when the bottom fell out on my health with a paralyzed left eye [the differential diagnosis of which included brain cancer, stroke, multiple sclerosis, etc.] with resulting double vision, daily hammerknocker migraine headaches, an out of control blood pressure and a thyroid gland that mysteriously just "disappeared" over the course of four weeks. Still to this day, there has been no medical explanation for this sudden constellation of symptoms. I know many people who have suffered more and have experienced much more sorrow than I, and of course, I see the suffering of my patients on a daily basis. But I can at least relate to much of what they have experienced. You may recall a poem written by Robert Browning Hamilton that seems to sum up a lot of what I'm trying to say here:
I walked a mile with Pleasure;
She chatted all the way;
But left me none the wiser
For all she had to say.
I walked a mile with Sorrow,
And ne'er a word said she;
But, oh! The things I learned from her,
When Sorrow walked with me.
Yet society tells us the things we must do and what we must acquire to be happy -- a new boat, a bigger house, a better job, a beach, lake or mountain home. I know the falsity of this. I have counseled many people who have all these things, and I can tell you they are not happy because of them. I've seen too many marriages that have disintegrated when they had all the stuff in the world ... families who have fought and argued all the time despite the fact that they had both money and health. Having more does not keep us from wanting more. And if we always want more -- to be richer, more beautiful, more well known -- we miss the bigger picture, and I can tell you from experience that happiness will never come.
Remember that when a baby comes into the world, his hands are clenched into a fist. Why? Because a baby not knowing any better, wants to grab everything, to say in a way, "The whole world is mine." Yet when an old person dies, how does he do so? With his hands open. Why? Because he has learned the lesson. You can't take it with you. So there it is ... the secret to happiness. Be satisfied. Be grateful. For what you have. For the love and grace you have received. For what God has given to you.
Paul said in Philippians 4:11 that he "had learned to be content whatever the circumstances" and in 1 Timothy 6 that "if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. [For] people who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs."
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